At what age do you let your children start having their own accounts for online stuff or technological gadgets? Examples are Email addresses, social sites (facebook, myspace, pintrest etc), a cell phone, ipod, or laptop.
Today I had to ask myself these questions and not because I wanted to. KJ has been in Texas for this past month and today I was told by her biological dad that he not only bought her an ipod, but also created a skype account, an apple account, a facetime account, and an email account for her, in her name. Keep in mind she just turned 5..... So does a 5 year old really need all those accounts?
Thus far KJ has been using skype through our accounts (her dad's and mine). And there has never been a problem using our own accounts, so I don't know why he felt he needed to create one for her. If I was in total control I don't think I would have let her have an email account until at least the age of 9 or 10. Legally, children under the age of 13 aren't suppose to have facebook accounts. I think 15 or 16 would be a better age, but that is my opinion. What about cell phones? I have heard some parents say they feel better with their children having a cell phone at a very young age incase something happens.
Don't get me wrong.... I let KJ get online to practice her typing, and play online games on the PBS kids site, and if the ipod was only to be used for movies and games I wouldn't have a problem.
But what do you all think? At what age is the internet and technology appropriate for children? I am really struggling to be okay with my 5 year old having a gmail account. I feel like it will be just one more thing I have to monitor, and be worried about. Does anyone have any advice or opinions about this? Am I over reacting?
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| KJ watching a DVD in the car with her headphones |
Meghan, I think you're totally right to be upset about this. For one, he should have asked you. And two, she has plenty of time to have these things and there aren't any reasons why she should have them as a 5 year old. It just creates the avenue to abuse it later. Not saying she will, but as a teacher of juniors and seniors, I see it every day. These kids are obsessed with technology. Their cell phones, ipods, ipads, facebook, twitter. We're having huge problems with trying to control the use of cell phones in school. They look at them constantly. Almost like a bad habit or an addiction. They don't even realize it most of the time. I would tell him that you don't feel comfortable with her having her own accounts. Maybe compromise with one of them. A skype account or something that doesn't have the potential to be abused. Make sure he's clear that in the future, these types of decisions need to be made together and that he can't "buy" her love with the latest thing.
ReplyDeleteI think you are right she should not have such things at this age. It leads tio dangerous things as they dont have an emotional maturity to guard themselves. My cousin's daughter got herself in some trouble on her cell at 10 she was texting a boy she didn't know. Turns out he was a 30 year old man. Ask for all her account passwords and cancel them when she comes home. Talk to her about it. Children should never be alone on the internet. Predators target certain searches on the internet to display horrible, disgusting trash for innocent eyes to see. As for her dad...like he's going to listen to you. Send him some articles from the internet on the dangers of social media for kids and tell him to watch cyberbully. Hopefullly he well care more about what's best for KJ instead of being fun dad and trying to show you up. Probably not but one can hope.
ReplyDeleteI think you are totally in the right for feeling that she is too young. I don't currently have kids but I do have several nephews and a niece. My sisters-in-law set the 8 yr olds up for facebook pages (YES! You read that correctly!) and I almost had a conniption fit. I attempted to point out to them the dangers of kids these age having online profiles, predators that are out there, etc, but they didn't ever listen to me. Let alone the fact that this is a violation of the terms of service. They even allow the kids to have picture of themselves up. I don't understand at all the need for kids to have all the electronics. Every time I see a child with a cell phone I think to myself 'who are they really calling?' I get a TON of junk mail. Does he really want K.J. to receive email that say some lewd comments?! I could MAYBE understand an ipod nano or something tiny for music; easily monitored because you can see what is downloaded and deleted questionable content. You have primary custody and I feel he needs to respect that and also that you need to work together to make decisions. I agree that should consider deleting the accounts. Maybe use the ipod as a 'treat' or for when you make long trips. I can't imagine a child of 5 (even one as fantastic as K.J.) would be responsible enough to keep an ipod safe. Friends of mine let their 13 yr old daughter have a nano and she let it be sent through the washing machine. No more electronics for her. I do NOT feel like you are over reacting; if he had bought her an ice cream cone and you went balistic...maybe but a gadget for each year of her life? I think she has more stuff than ME!
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